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Sunday, July 17, 2011

Dear Regan

Hi! Okay, so hopefully this website will help me. All the others sucked! Hahaha this is going to be long so hang in there, okay? So I need boy advice. My name is Regan (like the president, the girl from The Exorcist, a ray gun, you pick :D), I'm 14 years old, and I'm hopelessly in love with a guy. His name is John, and he's older than me by exactly a year, a month and nine days (he's 15 now). So I've seen John* (*names have been changed) around for a couple of years, but I only really got to know him earlier this summer when we were in a theatre camp together. I don't know how it all started... probably when we were both set to work watching some of the younger kids and we ended up jamming to dubstep. But that led to him telling me a pervy joke, and he thought my reaction was hilarious so he decided I was cool. So a couple of days (and many many funny jokes) later, we discovered we had a ton in common so we exchanged numbers and he was all "YAY, new friend!!!" Hahaha it was kind of adorable. But that led to us joking around even more. It was super fun... so anyway a couple of days after we exchanged numbers I texted him because I realized when he put me in his phone he took a picture of me. See, I'm not a photogenic person. This is how the conversation played out: me: John. It's late. But I realized when you put me in your phone you took a picture. Can you send it to me so I know whether or not to send you a better one? John: Oh, don't worry about it. It's a good picture. me: But I need to see it so that I know whether or not it's sexy enough. See, I'm not a photogenic person. John: Aw, yea you arrrrrrrrrrrrr. End of conversation. That made me become extremely flirty, and he flirted back alot. Every possible waking moment we were at least in the same room. He would randomly hug me alot, too. Like, I'd be standing there having a conversation with a friend and I'd suddenly have a 5'8 boy hanging off my waist. We flirted all the time, and I think he tried to get my attention because sometimes he'd make references to his... certain male appendage, but only if he thought I was listening. One time I was standing right in front of him and a kid came up and pantsed him. There were, like, seven other people in the room and immediately they all went out and told everyone who wasn't in the room about it and suddenly everyone was making fun of him. I didn't make fun of him, though. I actually defended him and told them not to be mean and I think that brought he and I closer together. See, people make fun of John all the time. They call him ugly (which he most definitely is NOT, lemme tell ya), say he has no life just because he plays Minecraft, and call him gay (which I know for a fact he is not) just because he dances and is good at it. I don't, and I think he appreciates it alot. So anyway, this flirting thing went on alot and towards the end of the camp we were doing a special performance of the play at the Library. John lost his phone and couldn't find it anywhere, so I called it and eventually found it for him. Now normally a person would just say thanks or maybe if we were close friends hug me, but John kissed me on the cheek. 

That is not a normal thank you, let me tell ya. I fell even harder for him, and we hung out for the rest of the performance. Then we went out into the lobby and looked at the movie posters because sometimes the library shows free movies. Well this movie happens to be Scott Pilgrim vs. the World, which also happens to be my favorite movie. So I said I was going to go, and John said he'd go too. Well, the camp ended. We texted some after that, but then it was less and less. About two weeks ago I texted him asking if he was still going to the movie and he said no. But our latest interaction was him saving me from a girl who wouldn't leave me alone for anything. I talked to a couple of friends about it, and they all didn't know if he liked me back or not. One thought he definitely liked me back, though, because of the kiss. I, myself, don't know. John is wierd about people. He doesn't really like new people, and he doesn't like being liked/cared about. He hates alot of people too, but he told me he doesn't hate me. He's kinda desperate and hasn't had a date since seventh grade, though. So I need advice. Do you think he likes me back? Or does he just want to stay friends? Is it worth starting a relationship with him? Do you think he hasn't texted me because he might possibly think I like him too much or something? He doesn't know I love him, and I don't have the guts to tell him. I'm kind of afraid of rejection and things turning awkward. Please help soon! We go to the same church and we'll be going to the same school this year, and pretty soon a friend and I are going to surprise him at a play he's doing. So Please help soon! Thanks, and sorry this was kind of long and rambly...


Hey Regan! OK so there are a couple of things we need to address here. 
Boys, boys, boys. Do they even know what they want? At that age: no! Boys rarely know what they want unless it is put in front of them. Which is why he maybe seemed so into you when he saw you everyday, but when there was no excuse to hang out, he probably was not ready to put in the effort or get attached because he wouldn't be seeing you much anymore. He probably does "like" you, but that means different things to boys than girls, especially at that age. You may want him as a boyfriend, but to him "liking" someone could just be flirting and kisses on the cheek. You might even have him as a boyfriend eventually. The next step from here, though, is developing a stronger friendship (that means less flirting, and maybe taking an interest in Minecraft! LOL) 
However, for future reference, liking someone too much CAN be a turn off, for boys and girls. Also, thinking about a guy too much can make him, in your mind, someone who is better than he is. 
Remember: Whoever it is at the moment, he is just a guy! They make mistakes, they are not perfect, and are confusing. All boys at this age are (trust me, I would know) 
Planning a surprise for him is nice, but make sure you present the event as a FRIEND not a girlfriend! 
Thanks for sending in your question! We hope we helped. 


Follow your instincts, but don't forget you have a brain :)


Xoxo,
Shane and Honour



Sunday, July 10, 2011

Dear Alexi

To Shane and Honour:
"Here is my question:
I love makeup and lip gloss and shopping! My parents don't seem to understand! I'm to young to go shop by myself and don't have anyone else to take me. How can I get my parents to understand what I like? I've already told them, but it just doesn't sink in! Also do you have any ways a young girl could earn money, because then maybe my parents would accept it more! "

Hey Alexi!
  One reason why your parents might not want you to wear makeup, is because makeup is a sign of independence and growing up. It can be fun however. Whether to wear makeup or not depends on your age. From 11-12 is a good time to start getting into it. You could wear lipgloss, and mascara on special occasions. It's a good way for you and your parents to learn how a teenager should use it.
   As for buying makeup, you can go with a friend and their parents either to the mall, or a drugstore. You could also try DIY's (Do it yourself projects) at home. A couple ways to earn money is to be a mother's helper. In this job, you can go to a house and take care of a little kid while the mother is there, but does other stuff she needs to take care of, without the kid bothering her. I, Honour, did this with a family friend and it was a great and fun way to earn money. If you need any help, the mother is there for you as a backup. Once you get better at this and get a little older, you can start babysitting. Another way to earn money is to do chores around the house and get the mail and take care of plants of a neighbor who is out of town. You could also convince your parents with reasons why you should be wearing makeup, such as 'It boosts your confidence.'
Hope this helps!
xo,
Honour and Shane

Thinking of You- How It Works

    Thank you for visiting our blog! First, a little bit about ourselves:
Hi! We are both 14 and like to do theater, sing, and play guitar and piano. We love makeup, beauty, and fashion. 
   The basic idea for our blog is that by answering questions our readers ask, we give more specific advice and can reach a  lot of people with a similar problem. 
   Want to send a question in???
   Email thinkingofyou18@yahoo.com with your question, and we will post it on our blog and answer for others to see! We will only include your first name, and also change any other names in your post to keep personal information private. 
   Thanks again for visiting, show your friends, and feel free to email us any questions!
Xoxo
Shane and Honour